03:03:54 Saturday January 24 2004
Today I learned about empty adverbs. After a careful reading I have determined that this must be the reason my writing seems so flat nowadays. I can see how they crept in. Seven years of scientific education taught me that you cannot say anything that isn't math without qualifying it. Phrases such as: "It is currently believed that..." and "Hopefully future work will explain..." Are so common in scientific literature that they have begun to seep into my brain. I also have adopted a much more relativistic philosophy. In high school it was so damn easy to write everything without qualification because life was simple and right was right and wrong was wrong. I don't believe that anymore and because I govern my life from first philosophical principles it is difficult to avoid qualifying things. None the less I shall make a concerted effort to eliminate them. Let us see how it goes. Once again without the waffling.

Tomorrow Brad makes the long trip back to Alabama. As Sara with no 'H' said a moment ago. "It is actually kinda sad." And so it is. I have enjoyed Brad's company a great deal these last two years. He may be a son of a bitch, but he is the type of son of a bitch that is great to have around. I was very surprised at how willing he was to join my little group of super dorky friends. I am glad he did. I know all of our lives have been made much more interesting by having him about.

I am very bad at goodbyes. When I know someone is leaving my first instinct is to spend less and less time with them. I tend want to ration them out of my life. I know the feel good pop psychology camp will feed me some bullshit line about how I should be treasuring the little time we have together. I don't buy it. When I spend time with the nearly departed all I can think about is how this is probably the last time we will drink a beer together or the last time we will watch Futurama together. I am never able to treasure the time. Each minute brings another "last time" it is just too depressing. It is best just to let them fade away. I have delusions that one day not long from now when it comes time for me to move on I won't tell anyone until a few days before. I would avoid people for a few weeks, then send out the mail that I am moving to Azerbaijan next Thursday. Of course the logistics of accomplishing something like that are mind boggling, but it would be fitting if I just faded away one day.